Retreat
by guiltypleasureffnet
Summary: Where did Father Mac send Peter on retreat?


When Peter had decided to go on retreat he was excepting to be sent to one of the centres in Dublin, not to a parochial house in an unknown and distant corner of the Emerald Isle.

Father Mac had explained to the curate that the island had a significantly smaller congregation than Ballykea, a resident parish priest, a curate, and an elderly priest who would occasionally take services, meaning that it was highly unlikely that Peter would be called upon to fulfil any duties. Apparently, this made it the ideal location for Peter to redecidate himself to his vocation.

Although Father Mac's arguments had merit, Peter assumed that he was probably being sent there as a cost saving measure, but ultimately it didn't really matter. Going on retreat was the only way he would be able to stay in Ballykea, and he desperately wanted to stay in the small Irish village.

*

As Peter sat in the aged and rickety boat he couldn't help but replay the last conversation he'd had with Assumpta. He knew that he shouldn't be thinking about her, and that ultimately he was going on retreat to "scrub that woman" from his mind, but seeing her reaction to his impending departure had torn him up inside and left him with more questions than answers.

Over the last few months (a year if he was honest) he had been busy fighting his own demons - both scared and concerned by the increasing depth and intensity of his feelings for the publican - without much thought for how she had felt. There had been a few brief conversations and moments that hinted her feelings for him weren't entirely platonic, like the night when they were drinking red wine alone in the bar, but her reaction to his leaving had made it clear that she felt more for him then just friendship. At that moment he knew his recent behaviour had been inexcusable; the way she gripped the agar until her knuckles were white, the tears that formed in her eyes, and the crack in her voice, all told him that things had gone too far.

Father Mac had laid the blame for Peter's prediciment squarely at Assumpta's door, but Peter didn't agree. He was a priest and therefore was held to a higher moral standard than his parishioners - even the ones who don't take the sacraments. Being a good man Peter had made his objection to the parish priest's assertion clear, but nothing was going to change Frank MacAnally's mind. He warned Peter that such fervent defense of the publican's virtue made him doubt the claim that nothing had happened between the couple, and that if he continued to act in such a manner he would find himself in somewhere simular to his retreat location permanently - and it wouldn't be a choice.

Regardless of Assumpta's feelings, Peter knew that ultimately the parish priest was right - he needed to "scrub that woman" from his mind.

*

The boat from the mainland had left alot to be desired in regards to its structural integrity, so Peter was relieved fo get his feet on dry land. On first impression the island seemed haunting - a stark contrast to Ballykea - slightly dreery and deviod of life. But as he surveyed his surroundings he could see some sheep and what looked like a small row of shops in the distence. He had been told the island was small, so small in fact that you could walk its length and breadth within a couple of hours, but he doubted that would be wise. He had learnt quickly that the weather in Ireland was changeable, and he wouldn't want to get caught in a torrential downpour - especially if he could aviod it.

The thought of walking along the road, unprepared for such adverse weather cinditions, made him think of his first meeting with Assumpta. As soon as he had seen her he'd thought she was beautiful, and when she had told him her name he couldnt think of anything more fitting for her beauty. As she'd driven them to the village Peter had found her a bit intimidating, but the atmosphere in the van had shifted when he'd told her he was the new priest; her friendly jovial manner was replaced by sarcasm and an air of tension. He had spent many an hour trying to recall every moment of that journey - their conversations, the guestures, her smell, and the small details of her appearance - but he had always struggled. He struggled because he had so many memories of Assumpta and their time together, especially their unnoticed 'almost' moments. Over time the details of the first meeting had faded in importance and were replaced with newer, fresher memories and 'almost' moments.

While he waited, Peter briefly considered whether things would've been different if he had noticed, or either of them had acknowledged, those 'almost' moments. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, carefully he focused on steadying his breathing, feeling the cold crisp air on his face, and grounding himself. With a new resolve he reminded himself that he needed to "scrub that woman" from his mind.

*

The priest had been standing by the jetty for at least fifteen minutes before he decided to try and find a phonebox. He had been expecting to be greeted by at least one of the island's resident priests - after all there was three of them - but the only person he could see was a man sitting on a rock wearing an 'I shot JR' t-shirt.


End file.
